Career advice

I find it very intriguing, how everyone always says the same old, infamously cliche piece of career advice, "Follow your heart, and do what you want to do."

And nobody does.

A small spot

It's my second last week at UBS.

Though I have not undergone as much pressure and work as the rest, I've tried to learn as much as i could. The sheer scale and magnitude of IT in UBS is really awe-inspiring, and revs up my interest in knowing how everything fits together into a trillion-dollar financial institution. Still, I don't have a clue in the world what i want to do for a career. And it definitely shows (and hurts) in my confidence, my drive factor. But there's no point thinking too much about it either, is there.

It's also my 3rd last week to FOC.

Things are going smoothly, with Shan, WC and i working hard along with the rest of the comm. We are really putting in great efforts to make sure we get every single aspect prepared for the camp. Even though it is always easy to get the mood high and for everyone to enjoy themselves during an orientation camp, I definitely want to minimize the trouble, the confusion, the last minute fumbling about behind the scenes. Every little detail we miss out now will cause someone to suffer down the road. That's the responsibility we uphold, and we have to take it very seriously.

At times i can't help but hate myself, for being so proud of my chairs and my comm one moment, and completely vexed and frustrated at not having things my way in the next. I'm clumsy at expressing myself, i'm so single-minded it blinds, and i regret every stubborn episode i get into. Please let me keep growing up. God knows i'm still a child.

And sometimes when i shed all these roles in my life, i feel so much self-doubt and emptiness. I can't help but wonder, What am I doing here? Where do i really belong?

... It must feel so good to be at ease with your life, to find a small little spot in this vast, diverse world where you can fit in happily.

A path to happiness

Reached the midway mark of my internship at UBS!

Things are starting to look up. I have been enjoying frequent conversations with my mentor TM, about career, self-development and life. Plus I made some breakthroughs recently in my project, by getting to know the front-office sales and traders. Last but not least, I made fast friends with LY, Mr Sun et al :) Sadly XF has ended his work here... and the rest, too, will finish up in a couple of weeks. I will dearly miss them and their silly antics, the crappy BS.

Today I went to join the Hall 11 Devils for their skirmish with some old birds team from Ngee Ann poly. Struck out twice, totally out of it haha. Made a solid hit to third base tho. And as usual, my outfield drought continues. The last time any good ball came to me was at the interhalls two years ago. But anyway, today was more to show face and catch up with the softball peeps than anything else. I haven't had time to catch up with them for so long.

Afterwards, rushed to Khai's birthday party. Had fun with the rainbow befrienders and kids, who're still very much spirited and lively. Ruijie sure wore me down by the time i brought him home! Haha. Anyway, Khai received loads of presents! Pohlin and Huijiao even prepared a custom-made birthday card. His family also pampered us with some good food and ice-cream cakes. And we ended the night playing with sparklers in the lobby.

Sometimes i wonder if life were meant to be busying about meeting friends, fulfilling commitments ... or spent freely without a care in the world.

And which would be the true path to happiness.